Leadership Polarities: Navigating the Tension

In our lives, we often encounter stress and tension arising from what we perceive as conflicting values or states of being. For example, some of us value and protect our need for freedom but intellectually appreciate the value and need for more structure in our lives. Others are so goal-driven that they create little space for innovation or emergence. Or perhaps struggle with wanting to achieve results while also focusing on the well-being of team members; or wanting to provide team members with autonomy while fostering a sense of teamwork and collaboration. You get the drift. In my case, and not unlike many others I work with, one of the polarities I struggle with is the polarity of valuing the safety associated with playing small while wanting to realize my big, hairy audacious goal.

By playing small and within my comfort zone, I protect myself from the risks associated with playing big. For example, the risk of rejection from a lack of likes or criticism on social platforms such as LinkedIn, or having to deal with the disappointment that people might not want my offering. However, I do so at a big cost. I miss out on personal growth, a sense of accomplishment, expanded opportunities, increased resilience, and most of all, living my life on purpose.

 We ALL experience polarities and depending on what we have learned and where we are in our development, we deal with them differently. As we mature, we move from seeing the polarity as an either/or that needs to be fixed, to a both/and that has a ‘third way’. We learn how to hold multiple perspectives simultaneously, and in doing so how to navigate the complexity of our environments with greater ease.

 Identifying and discussing polarities is often a transformative conversation I have with my coaching clients, whether as part of the women’s leadership forum I lead or the individuals I coach.

 Do you relate to what I shared?

 If you’re interested in learning more, please connect with me to learn more about the services I provide and the Women-only Leadership Development Forum I lead.

About the Author: Claire is a consultant, facilitator, and executive coach with over 25 years of experience in leadership, team, and organizational development.